The Almost-Annual Matt Armbruster Memorial



This ride-on toy is for novelty purposes only and is not to be used near swimming pools, on or near hills, roadways, or stairways. This product is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. This tricycle is not designed or manufactured for competition use or stunting. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Replace if pitted, scratched, or defective. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. Off road riding is hazardous. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. All models over 18 years of age. Caution: Tarts may be hot when removed from the toaster. Return to protective container when not in use. If condition persists, consult your physician. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Subject to change without notice. Times approximate. Simulated picture. Riding at night is hazardous. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. For off-road use only. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may, in time, fade. Shoes must be worn at all times when riding this toy. We have sent the forms which seem to be right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. Post office will not deliver without postage. It is prohibited by federal law to concentrate and inhale this product for purposes inconsistent with its labeling. List was current at time of printing. Always use approved safety lighting when riding at night. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. Protects against flying particles. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your canceled check is your receipt. Add toner. Place stamp here. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Designed for only one rider at a time. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Do not allow children to play with these parts. The following stunts were performed by professionals, so for your safety and the protection of those around you, we insist that neither you nor your dumb little buddies attempt any of what you're about to see. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. High temperatures may be generated under certain abnormal conditions. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to insure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Professional driver on closed road, do no attempt this yourself. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in well-ventilated area. Keep away from fire or flame. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Complies with latest ANSI and OSHA standards. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. This product stays fresh and delicious on your kitchen shelf. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs, or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. Void where prohibited by law. Call toll free before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Some states do not allow the exclusion or limitation of incidental or consequential damages, so the above limitation or exclusion may not apply to you. I agree to bail Matt out of jail if necessary requested. This supersedes all previous notices.

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Signature Date

(Press hard, six copies)

The Almost Annual Matt Armbruster Memorial Big Wheel Rally, BWR, Captain Obvious, "Obvious" Emblem, & all content 1991- Matt Armbruster.
Contact Us | 888-252-6379 v/f | PO Box 314, Lafayette, Colorado 80026
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